Sunday, December 23, 2018

Holidays and Grieving

Supporting a Loved One:

1. Acknowledge that this is a very hard time of year and acknowledge their pain.

2. Be supportive and understanding if they do not want to participate in holiday events or they need to take things slow.

3. It's okay to talk about the loved one that has passed on and use the loved ones name.

4. Just be there to listen and let them know they can come to you. Don't feel like you have to fix anything or have the right words, Being there are listening is definitely the best.

For the Griever:

The Holidays can be a very difficult time for those dealing with grief. There is so much pressure to be happy and engage in celebration. Holidays are about family and when a member of the family has passed away there is a big hole left where they once were. There are so many memories of past holidays, for myself unpacking decorations my from my sons first Christmas and the decorations he made in school was very difficult. This will be our first Christmas without our son, it has been incredibly difficult. It has been four months since he passed away and the closer it get's to Christmas the more difficult it becomes for me.

I feel like the most important thing is to feel what you are feeling and not judge that. If you feel you cannot celebrate at all, don't. If you have other children (like I do) and you feel like you want to still celebrate Christmas (or whatever Holiday you celebrate) you can take it at your own pace. If you need to step away to breathe or cry, that's completely okay. Don't judge yourself.

Be gentle with yourself.

I have seen ideas of starting a new tradition such as writing letters to your loved one or something else you feel honors their memory. 

If you need support there are many facebook groups for people who are grieving, or if you need immediate help you can always call the national suicide helpline at 1-800-273-8255. 

Great big (((((HUGS))))) from me!!

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